April 21st, 2009


sins of the fathers

Thanks to my friends with the 'friends page' advice. I have enough ideas now.

I had a loooong talk with my cousin tonight on the phone. She split up with her partner yesterday and is trying so hard to be really positive. I actually taught him years ago which was a bit of a laugh with all of us but it emerges that he wasn't that good to her. He drinks a lot. Every night. He was verbally abusive. He was controlling. Her friends are pleased he's gone. I have to admit it's a bit sad on one level. We had some good times all together. But my cousin's happiness, well-being, self-esteem and security are so very, very much more important. We're going to see her tomorrow, have dinner and provide some company for the evening. She has great children. She bought some chocolate yesterday and said to them, This house has a new name, the House of Fun. I've bought a big cake of chocolate and I have some dice, so let's play the chocolate game! Her older son, who is Finn's age, said dryly, Did you think you'd win us over with that? Fine, she said, laughing, just eat the chocolate! I really admire her bravery and her positive attitude. Our fathers were brothers, so we sure understand that old phrase, sins of the fathers. We have both been known to quote it. But we thought we'd gotten away from those influences. She wonders how she got back into it.
I wonder how much people suffer behind closed doors, controlled by their partners, fearful of getting free, their insides in knots. At least my cousin has a new chance. New possibilities. Needs a car and a job now as they shared a business... I know she'll do well though.

On other fronts, we went lamp shopping today in the rain. Bought three lamps, one for each child's bedside. Sorted the soccer team. Visited a friend for afternoon tea. We've been busy, I guess. I wish the holidays could last forever. Now it's half past midnight and I want to do some writing. But tomorrow - make that later today - looks very busy... *sigh* temptations...