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I was waiting for Christy and Finn to finish their music session – it involved the two of them playing the same tune on differently tuned instruments, a violin and a B flat clarinet, but with no adjusting for that OMG! - and so I sat here, ignoring them, and had a big cleanout of some stuff on this PC. Some things I cleaned out left me feeling really awful but I think it's good I did it anyway. Other things just made me wonder why they were saved in the first place! I just deleted…
A whole pile of not great worksheets done by Asher for his class last year
A heap of Prayers of the Faithful docs that somehow got saved for no apparent reason
A pile of German tax letters I used to proofread for a friend, don't know how those got saved either
All of last year's ridiculously long tennis e-mails
A whole folder called Suil – she's just not around any more
A pile of stuff from Kathi
A huge pile of amazing emails and info about Paul Gross, Rob Lowe and the world all saved from just one person
My vast collection of 'I will not talk to you again' and 'you are a bitch' e-mails - just seeing those again hurt a lot, more than I can say, but I guess it's good they're gone, even though I never understood any of them properly – at least I nearly don't care any more – I think that's good to be able to really let go - thing is, I always in my heart thought they'd come back one day. All six... I don't any more though. I would still like it. But I don't expect it. Nope. No.
- and how awful if my children had found them! OMG!
A Sam story – the last one I started and the only one I never finished – now that was a surprise, I hadn't realised I'd even written it. I'm glad I stopped though. This one promised to be tender and delightful. Gosh. Too bad. Gone now!

Thinking about writing a Sam story is just so horrific I can't bear it. It was an amazing time though. I learned a lot about writing in that time, a whole lot. Feedback was so instant and rewarding and intelligent. Good old West Wing…

I had a good day at school but I had way too many classes to teach! OMG! It's just so busy all freaking day! Oh well, it's okay for a job though. At least it's interesting, intensely interesting. People-centred. Rewarding. Challenging. I am really rather lucky to have this opportunity. I'll keep growing, huh. We always do. Otherwise, we're just wasting good time. It's worth doing good. It's worth taking on challenges. But I would like a little more time in a day for me ;-)
Well, writing this gave me a good fifteen minutes, better go get Asher from soccer before we have to take Christy to clarinet... and cook dinner somewhere along the way! Yikes. Dinner.

Comments

natesmountain
May. 3rd, 2007 10:00 am (UTC)
Yeah, the 'one tone out' music was pretty bad, but Finn loved it! Christy just liked the joining in aspect.

I guess a new laptop does force you to have a cleanout. And I guess it doesn't hurt to let go of memories. I'm really bad for hanging onto things, but the things here really made me very sad, so I guess it's better to let go.

-Glad you're enjoying the work, even if it is too busy - face it - 24 hours every day is simply not enough - sigh!
Yeah, the work itself is good. But it's hard. I have to learn so much for every class!

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